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Joke of the Day

"Nice hourglass figure, girl. Wanna come back to my place and stand on your head so my friends and I can keep time while we play Pictionary?"

"They say there is safety in numbers tell that to 6 million jews"

"Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet ? He wanted to see the floor show !"

"They irony of being hit by a Dodge."

"Whenever I start to disrobe in front of a lady; I always hand her a card that states ""A mild sense of Nausea is perfectly normal"""

"Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer."

"People ask me why I don't like spoons. Idk why really. They just seem pointless to me."

"Le'Veon Bell, Josh Gordon and Tom Brady walk into a bar To watch the first 4 weeks of the NFL season"

"""And you don't want hairy hands, now do you? Oh! And googling 'it' will make you go blind..okay! Mommy loves you."" - Sis at her 9 year old."

"What's the difference between a slut and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it."