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Joke of the Day

"How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? None. The light bulb will change itself when it's ready."

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"Admiral Ackbar sez, ""drop it like..."" http://i.imgur.com/R896U.jpg"
"Why are there no female necrophiliacs? Because dead guys can't spend money."
"A 40 year-old man is walking into some dark woods with an 8 year-old girl... ...the girl says, ""These woods are scary!"" The man says, ""How do you think I feel? I have to walk out all by myself!"""
"'What just cracked?' A guide to aging."
"What's the difference between In-n-Out Burger french fries and League of Legends? I can control my salt intake at In-n-out."
"An Irishman walks out of a bar... ...could happen."
"I'm optimistic. My life is only half full of shit."
"Why doesn't a dog ever have a nose 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot."
"Kidnapping Did you hear about the local kidnapping at the school? It's fine, he woke up."
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