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Joke of the Day

"What branch of government actually listens to the people? [The NSA !](/spoiler)"

"Cut to Obama and Biden silently eating schwarma."

"Why are peppers irritating? Because they're jalapeno business!"

"Mexico replaced America as the world's fattest country because we sent them all home."

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline? You take your boots off to jump on a trampoline"

"*does 3 or 4 pretty accurate karate kicks in front of a girl* ""Ya as I was saying my dad went to middle school with the drummer from Tesla"""

"Why do they call it Almond Milk? Because if they called it Nut Juice nobody would buy it."

"(Spoilers) Ian McShane in GoT I guess that makes him Deadwood."

"I heard that wordplay was illegal. Apparently there is serious PUNishment."

"Did you know that papa johns was delivering to the twin towers on nine eleven? The order was for two large planes!"