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Joke of the Day

"I like to pride myself on knowing whether it's Ice Ice Baby or Under Pressure by the first bum bum bum badda dum bum."

"White guys can't say the N word But they can say ""Won't happen again officer"" and ""Welcome home dad"""

"How small you are in the universe In class there is a sub in class and is talking about how small I am in the universe and I reply ""teacher I'm small in the universe but I know were I'm big"""

"The ""impossible"" EM Drive works, space travel just became more viable. Yet Half Life 3 still unconfirmed."

"What do you call a bisexual vietnamese person? **Bi**ngo."

"I got aids in prison.. Hearing aids. I should've used them though, I might've been able to hear the guy that snuck up on me in the shower and gave me HIV."

"The god of time is going back to school to upgrade. Time will take its course"

"Nigel: You said the school dentist would be painless but he wasn't. Teacher: Did he hurt you? Nigel: No but he screamed when I bit his finger."

"I had an imaginary girlfriend for a few years, but she ended up leaving me for my best friend. He had a bigger imagination than I did."

"Tourist: Is this 99 Main Street? Resident: No it's 66 but we turn it upside down to confuse people."