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Joke of the Day

"Announced sternly to students today that ""only hard things are worth doing!"" In other news, I have a bunch of parent emails to respond to."

"Thanksgiving is here, and I love trigonometry sorry, I went off on a tangent."

"How many Police Officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know, they were too busy beating up the room for being black."

"[furious with son] wife: what happened? me: he talks back to me and is insulting me in Spanish [son from room] yolo isn't spanish me: ya see"

"Damn, girl! Are you Iocane Powder? Because I've spent the last few years of my life building up an immunity to Iocane Powder. So, yeah..."

"""Eat her already!"" - Animal watching people kissing"

"if pointing out racism makes me a racist, then i'm going to start pointing out millionaires."

"I hate w.hen my period comes early"

"Home is where the heart is, and hopefully it's where all of the other vital organs reside too."

"I'm not afraid of identity theft. Go ahead and enjoy being broke and having my dad call you a failure."