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Joke of the Day

"(NSFW) I might have a needle dick. But I fuck like a sewing machine."

"I finally got tinder And after a few matches, I was able to start a campfire."

"What do you call a psychic dwarf that escapes from a prison? A small medium at large."

"What do you ask a Mexican girl you like? Netflix and chili?"

"Q: How do you get 2 piccolos to play a perfect unison? A: Shoot one."

"I just did one of those ""what noun are you"" quizzes... and I got ""pedantic"", which is an adjective."

"Good punctuation is the difference between... Helping your friend, jack, off a horse, -or- helping your friend jack off a horse..."

"I've got a bag full of stick figure stickers, and when I see an SUV I add random dudes to their families."

"It's amazing that even 20 years later, pretending to shoot heroin with an mechanical pencil can still be a great way to procrastinate."

"What is a dog's favourite sport ? Formula 1 drooling !"