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Joke of the Day
"Was going to rob a bank today, but the pen was chained to the desk."
Next Joke
"What's Irish and lies around in the sun all day? Patty O'Furniture."
"Three guys walk into a bar... John Wick kills them with a pencil. A fucking pencil."
"Whats the best thing to put into a pie? Your teeth!"
"I'm never more aware that I don't have boobs than when I'm paying for my own drink."
"Making an analogy that references itself is like good word play. You don't do it anytime you want. You have to have a good reason to go metaphor."
"So I confronted and cursed my son out for being in a relationship with a man..... He told me his partner was a Tranny and I felt like such an idiot. Sorry Ma'am. Your masculine face had me off."
"Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupt... MOOOOOOOO!! (Kids seem to love this one)"
"I clicked ""Submit a Joke"" before thinking of what I'd say Now I know how the Republican party feels."
"Mother tells her computer geek son, ""Go get a carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6."" So he goes, and returns with 6 cartons of milk."