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Joke of the Day

"My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well !!!"

"A prisoner said to me today ""Boss, I think my cellmate is a fag"" ""cos he closes his eyes when i kiss him goodnight"""

"Why are people pissed off that Justin Bieber smoked some weed? It's not like he released another album or anything."

"The guy behind the counter asked me what I wanted on my sub and I said a collar and restraints and now I'm not allowed in Subway."

"What type of meat do catholic priests eat on Friday? Nun."

"People who talk at the cinemas really annoy me.. I can barely hear my phone over them!"

"Insert racist joke here... Change location of joke to Ferguson."

"If you jump through the hole in a hipster's earlobe you get transported to a SIMS game where the only people are Harry Potter characters"

"An Atheist, a Vegan and a Crossfitter walk into a bar I only know that because they told everyone all about it within 2 minutes... and again..and again."

"Hey guys let me know if you figure out a way for me to rt myself. Some of these are pretty great."