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Joke of the Day
"People who talk at the cinemas really annoy me.. I can barely hear my phone over them!"
Next Joke
"[Guy goes on a date w me] Hm not sure if he likes me [13 more dates] Dunno? [Marries me] It's so confusing [Stays w me 30 yrs] How do u tell"
"I find it inconsiderate that policemen always ask if I had been drinking but they never bother to ask if I had anything to eat at all"
"What do you call The Dynamic Duo after they got hit by a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon"
"Please stop telling me how you wish you had my curly hair. You don't know the struggle of waking up looking like Mufasa."
"Lethal tasers can be a real buzzkill."
"I found some good cookie recipes with weed the other day. Then I was like, ""That's a weird place to keep cookie recipes""."
"Have you read the book about the guy who can only ejaculate a virus? It's a classic coming-a-phage story."
"Elon Musk's space travel corp. decided not to fund the recent reboot of Carrie, just because they were scared... I guess you could say it was a *Sissy SpaceX.*"
"3 legged Dog A 3 legged dog walks into an old western salon, looks around, and says ""I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."""