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Joke of the Day

"How do you hold your liqour? I hold mine by the ears."

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"A man walks in to a library and asks for a book on Tourette's. The librarian says, ""Fcuk off, you cunt."" The man says, ""Yep, that's the one."""
"Buddy 1:Hey ever heard of the movie constipation? Buddy 2:No i have not. Buddy 1: that's because it hasn't come out yet."
"A time traveler walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve time travelers in here."" A time traveler walks into a bar."
"dear yahoo answers, i have a life question and i would like some bad advice and a link to a blog"
"What did Michael Jackson say at the bank? ""Make that change"""
"My time-travelling uncle died. RIP Robert Mack, 1968-1834"
"What did the ceiling fan say? YEEEEAAAAH! GO CEILING! YOU NUMBER ONE BABY! WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!"
"Need wrist jokes My little brother just broke his wrist and we are sitting in the hospital. He requested wrist jokes. Anybody have some?"
"What's the last thing a Redneck says before he dies? Watch this!"