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Joke of the Day

"A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says, ""We don't serve your kind in here!"" Mushroom says, ""Come on, I'm a fungi!"""

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"What is black and eats pussy? cervical cancer"
"I'm not sure if I want to move to Sweden... but the flag is a big plus."
"Oh you're a jogger? Good for you. I just burned 3000 calories in under 30 minutes. Can't believe I forgot that pizza was in the oven."
"If someone has a foot fetish... ...and they cheat, does that mean they got off on the wrong foot?"
"Why did Adele crawl under the cow? ...to say hello from the udder side. I'll take my Oscar now."
"Why did the chicken cross the road To see the ugly man. Knock knock Who's there? The chicken."
"Where's the feminist world headquarters? Bancock"
"How I flirt is how I run. It's funny to watch, I have no form, and I end up sweating like a mother fucker whenever it's over."
"I don't get why you have to call my wife *librarian ignores me while on phone* ""your husband is here trying to check out a book about ramps"""