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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a bus full of lawyers driving off a cliff? [A Good Start.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obKLdou0LH0)"

"Did you hear about the newly-released Michael Jackson autobiography? It's called ""The Ins and Outs of Child Rearing."""

"How do mathematicians cure constipation? They work it out with a pencil."

"What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat? One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws."

"A duck walks up to a lemonade stand... and he says quack, quack."

"Me: you want to end the date night with some bubbly? Wife: sure *I pour vinegar and baking soda into the volcano* Wife: this is so romantic"

"My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records. Until the library kicked me out...."

"What's a skydiver's favorite spice? Ground cumin! As long as they aren't running out of thyme."

"How many Obsessive-Compulsive P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb? Just one. But he has to check it 100 times one for each watt."

"What are the similarities between fat chicks and bricks? they both get laid by mexicans"