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Joke of the Day

"Don't call me "" bae "" "" baby "" "" babe "" or "" love "" unless I'm the ONLY ONE you're calling that."

"Ninety-sixing is how dyslexic people perform the sexual position where both partners are conducting oral sex on each other at the same time."

"What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common? They all went down on a President."

"Instead of smoking cigarettes, switch to hanging just outside an establishment, casually repeating that you want to die."

"What is a suicidal Weebs favorite anime? Bleach."

"How many plates do you need to draw a picture? Tenplates"

"and God said,"" Let there be light !"" Chuck Norris says"" Say please"""

"What's the difference between a Hummer and a cactus? A cactus has all the pricks on the outside."

"I don't need WebMD to tell me what's wrong with me, I have my mother."

"I shower with a suicide note in case I slip and die, at least I can make it look intentional instead of stupid."