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Joke of the Day

"What is the ardent task of searching for a new wallpaper called? Running a Backgroud Check."

"Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny? He was wanted for several charges of battery"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Carrie ! Carrie who ? Carrie a torch !"

"Don't be sad dirty dishes, nobody's doing me either."

"i feel like a hundred bucks! *my soul erupts with the strength of 100 wild male deers*"

"HR: welcome to sexual harassment training. Me *raises hand* I'm gonna leave. HR: it's mandatory. Me: There's nobody here I would harass."

"A scared look and a ""let me go google that"" is not what you want to hear from the gynecologist."

"Dad: ""Son, if you don't stop masturbating you're gonna go blind."" Son: ""I'm over here Dad."""

"A man and a boy are walking through the woods.. The boy turns to the man and says, ""these woods sure are scary."" The man turns to him and says, ""you're telling me, I have to walk back alone."""

"You can reach 80 years Doctor: Your health seems to be in such a condition that I believe you can reach 80 years. *But doctor, I am already 80!* You see - I told you to quit smoking."