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Joke of the Day

"You can reach 80 years Doctor: Your health seems to be in such a condition that I believe you can reach 80 years. *But doctor, I am already 80!* You see - I told you to quit smoking."

"What does a Japanese chef shout in bed? Ooo mami! (Umami)"

"My friend is so stupid that he thinks twice before saying nothing."

"I always get nervous before injections so I shut my eyes. I usually end up stabbing the chair."

"What is the worst thing about being black and Jewish? You have to stand at the back of the oven."

"After witnessing the second coming of Jesus. My life has changed. I have decided not to watch Mexican Porn again."

"hey honey... ... you remember that really posh restaurant we ate at? 'sure... i guess so' ... what about that one time i undercooked the chicken? 'YES. EVERY DETAIL'."

"My wife asked me to play doctor with her... ...she is now waiting for three hours in front of the bedroom."

"When someone says ""Happy New Years"" I wonder, how many years are they talking about?"

"A good name for a dog would be syndrome. Because then you could say down, syndrome. -courtesy of norm macdonald ;)"