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Joke of the Day
"the longest joke in the world http://longestjokeintheworld.com/"
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"So it's the first day of shop class... The teacher asks, ""What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?"" A girl raises her hand and says, ""I don't know. I've never been bolted before."""
"DOCTOR: If you don't exercise, there's really no point in dieting. ME: I can't wait to tell my wife the good news."
"How does Voldemort seal his mail? With his Parceltongue. (...I'll see myself out)"
"If I learned anything about politics from this election It's that politics isn't about the ass you kiss but the pussy you grab"
"How can you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? One you see later, and the other you see in a while."
"What's the most dangerous, predominantly black area known to man? Space"
"What goes 'clippidy clop bang bang clippidy clop'? An Amish drive-by."
"What does a lawyer and a prostitute have in common? They both fuck you for your money."
"I find the best way to deal with death is not to be the person who is dead."