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Joke of the Day
"Keep your friends close and your enemies in the trunk of your car."
Next Joke
"""Asphyxiate' would be worth like a million points..."" I thought to myself as I lay choking on a Scrabble tile."
"There is one instrument I just can't stand.. The Sitar"
"What do you call an accountant who is seen talking to someone? Popular"
"Why are boy scouts like human sacrifices in a cannibalistic society? Their motto is ""be prepared"""
"Customer told me this yesterday... First comes the engagement ring...followed by the marriage ring...but no one ever told me what came after that. The suffering."
"Will playing ""GTA IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony"" make me a homosexual? Same question for ""GTA IV: The Lost and The Damned."
"New users will never know about the old Twitter. I'll tell them stories of it, and how I walked uphill both ways. In the snow."
"They say masturbation makes you blind.... I don't see any problem with it."
"What do cannibals get when they are late for dinner? The cold shoulder"