220504

Joke of the Day

"Why does Chuck Norris play cowbell? Because he beats time!"

"Is there a stripper named ""Eggs Over Easy"" yet?"

"Why are gay men such bad people? Because they are all fucking assholes"

"My two year-old has begun shouting ""The end!"" in a sing-song voice when he wants you to stop talking to him. Going to try this myself."

"Stupid seal at the zoo would not sing ""kiss by a rose."" REFUND!"

"I like my coffee how I like my women... Quiet."

"Officer: Sir, we have reports you've trained this bird to injure passersby. Me: Ridiculous! O: The pet's name? M: Paul the Attack Canary."

"Why do people always ask me for directions? I have no clue where I am going. I am sure i have sent 100's of people into the ocean."

"God has no Phone, but I talk to him. He has no Facebook, but he is still my friend. He does not have a Twitter, but I still follow him."

"You call them ""cuss words""... I call them ""sentence enhancers""."