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Joke of the Day

"Every time I get a birthday card with money in it, I pretend not to notice the money and ""read"" the card."

"""Hey Juan, let me tell you a funny joke yeah?"" ""Joke!"""

"How does Dracula like to have his food served? In bite-sized pieces."

"Hey kids, for Halloween, let's go to a spooooky place full of scaaaary, oppressive people & a guy who riiiises from the dead! Kids: Church?"

"How do you know your girlfriend is getting fat? She fits into your wife's clothes."

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day... Teach a man to microwave a fish and he'll lose the respect of all his co-workers."

"So A C and E walk into a music bar... The bartender says ""I'm sorry, we don't serve minors."""

"What do you call it when you lease false teeth? A dental rental."

"How do you know your sister has started her period? Your Dad's dick tastes like blood"

"The thing about penis jokes is.. they tend to grow on you."