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Joke of the Day
"Just stole some energy bars from a store. I'm a joule thief."
Next Joke
"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle His wife is already pregnant"
"After 9 months and 347 pics of you being pregnant you REALLY only need to post one pic of the baby as proof. We believe you."
"I once stole a simile I made out like a bandit"
"""Hey mom, I talked to my teacher after school and she says 'hump day' isn't a real holiday... She also asked what you do for a living."""
"I was listening to ""Club Tropicana"" today... ... And it dawned on me. It's been ages since a heard a Wham! song. Come to think of it, it must have been Last Christmas."
"I've recently invented a new gaseous compound I like to call 'Fuh'. I like to spray myself with it before I go out. It often causes people to Fuh-cough."
"9: Why are you hitting that spider? wife: I don't like spiders me: Ooooh *grabs newspaper* mother-in-law [leaving] I don't have to take this"
"[throwing a party] I invited Judas. That okay? ""Judas from IT, or the guy who betrayed Jesu-"" *loud knock* ""It's the Roman legion. Open up!"""
"Two guys walk into a bar You'd think one of them would have seen it"