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Joke of the Day

"Reminds GOP that Obama's not a radical brown-skinned antiwar socialist giving away free healthcare. You're thinking of Jesus."

"What's the worst way to lose your job? By firing squad."

"What will be on the Denny's Menu when ISIS takes over? The Grand I-slam"

"What Do You Call a Terrible German Hot-dog Stand Owner? The Wurst Guy."

"Can you find the the mistake...? Can you find the the mistake 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20?"

"Why did the Scot screw the sheep on the edge of a cliff? So it would push back."

"What kind of bagel can fly? A plane bagel."

"15 year olds be like I remember 9/11"

"Reasons he didn't text you: - He forgot. - He fell asleep. - His phone died. - His pet died. - His GF died. - He died. - He thinks you died."

"What do ghosts use to predict the future? Horror-scopes!"