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Joke of the Day

"The most offensive jokes thread? I'll start What is the difference between chopping up a baby and an onion? - chopping up an onion makes you cry."

"Sometimes when I'm riding in an uber, I like to request another uber. Instant car chase."

"What has two legs and bleeds? Half a cat....."

"How short-sighted of you to include a fax number in your email signature but not the coordinates of your zeppelin dock."

"Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil."

"What does the government and pedophiles have in common? They defile private things."

"What do you call a chinese pedophile? Pok Um Yung"

"We all have that one friend that looks Chinese but isn't."

"I got an STD from a Canadian woman Hepatitis eh."

"What's harder to pull out of than Iraq? Bristol Palin."