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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell when someone does crossfit? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"Movies are so unrealistic. This guy's using his computer to access an alien ship & not once has it asked if he wants to upgrade his Adobe."

"I tried to keep this fart a secret.. but the news got out.. I guess it leaked."

"What do they call diarrhea at Hogwarts? expellianus!"

"Why are prostitutes cheaper compared to girlfriends and wives to many rich people? Because they dont have to pay attention"

"What does a Mon Calamari terrorist say? Allahu Ackbar!"

"A flight attendant says to a man... ""Would you like headphones?"" The man replies, ""How did you know my name was Phones?"""

"They say nothing in life that's worth having comes easily. Guess I'm really lucky to have my wife."

"Why is hip hop popular among urban youth? because it's the only time a black man can tell a crowd of white people to put their hands in the air."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic racist? He hated gingers."