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Joke of the Day

"Movies are so unrealistic. This guy's using his computer to access an alien ship & not once has it asked if he wants to upgrade his Adobe."

"You dug the hole you're in... now stop whining and start climbing."

"When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's LUNAR ASSAULT and it's not funny."

"I only wear adult diapers for 2 reasons #1 and #2"

"Paul Walker had to take some time off from the Fast and Furious series He was burnt out."

"Forget everything you learned in College.... ""Forget everything you learned in College, you won't need it working here."" ""But I never went to college."" ""I'm sorry your not qualified to work here."""

"Why did Blacula get kicked out of a Yale Halloween party? The party was for ""Wights only."""

"What did Adele say when the chicken crossed the road? Hello from the other side..."

"Did you hear about the zombie that went vegan? He called his decision a no-brainer"

"How dare room service question ""how many people"" I need 8 mimosas for "