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Joke of the Day

"I just bought some presents for my epileptic girlfriend's birthday Just a few small gifts, nothing too flashy."

"If ur late to an appt, just tell them u had another one, but were on time to that one. That way they associate you with punctuality"

"What do monkeys sing at Christmas ? Jungle Bells Jungle bells.. !"

"Trump/Pence 2016! Or ""TP"" as I like to call it. ;)"

"Precious Father-Son Time When I was a kid, my dad sat me down and showed me pictures of why I should always wear a condom...they were all just pictures of me."

"What kind of overalls does Mario wear? denimdenimdenim"

"What is Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAND EEEEEEEEEEYYYYYEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

"What's the most obvious slang word in the Star Wars universe? Yo, duh."

"Me and my husband Atilla got into an argument I told him ""hun, let's not fight""."

"I'm going to name my penis Hitler... ...because with one stroke it ends millions of lives in the shower."