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Joke of the Day

"Why do groups of birds always seem so shady? cuz they're always flockin' around"

"My grandma is 80 years old, and still doesn't need glasses... She drinks right out of the bottle."

"I like my women like I like my coffee. I don't drink coffee."

"I was raping a woman the other night and she cried, ""Please, think of my children!"" Kinky bitch."

"A painting was arrested... It cried out ""I've been framed! Don't hang me!"""

"My favorite genre of rap is bragging about all the murders you committed then complaining the cops pull you over for no reason."

"I saw a black guy carrying a TV down the street the other day so I had to run back home and check that mine was still there. It's OK though, mine was still there, just sitting there shining my shoes."

"I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist"

"Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century? Neckbeard!"

"I told wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back. Apparently you shouldn't say that to a woman with alopecia."