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Joke of the Day
"Lobster Tail & Beer. My three favourite things."
Next Joke
"You think you have a bad job? I'm working at the Return Desk at Toy R' Us in Connecticut"
"Why aren't there any mexicans in the Olympics? Cuz all that can run, jump or swim have got their ass over here."
"You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse."
"How do you get an elephant across a busy freeway? take the 'f' out of free and the 'f' out of way..."
"Linguistic studies have shown results about drivers of east asian cars... It is proven that a large number of Hyundai owners have an accent."
"Did you hear about the man who lost his left arm and left leg? He was alright."
"How does the blind man know when to stop wiping his arse? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you."
"This tweet has been brought to you by... ...Stay Free Maxi-pads... ...When your uterine lining looks like the elevator from The Shining."
"Im sat here looking at my glass half empty..... Everyone is telling me that I should look at my glass half full, but i just want to know, WHO THE FUCK DRANK MY DRINK"