195444

Joke of the Day

"How do you get an elephant across a busy freeway? take the 'f' out of free and the 'f' out of way..."

"i'm going to quit my job and open a donut shop that also sells weed i'll call it 'glazed and confused'."

"How do you sink a polish war ship? You put it in water"

"Why is it that sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So they don't get mistaken for feminists."

"What do you call a dog who likes to eat at subway? A sub-woofer!!"

"I've reached the point in my life where I'm ready for a life partner. But I'd probably be just as content with a cheeseburger."

"Why did the girl walk past her crush twice? He didn't believe in love at first sight."

"If you wear a cape to a meal, you can spin it around to the front and have a full sized bib for eating"

"How do you stop a woman giving you head? Marry her."

"My Grandad is always complaining about how much things cost. ""Two quid for a cup of tea?!""... I said, ""Well you just popped round, I didn't invite you!"""