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Joke of the Day

"The Beach Boys walk into a bar... ""Round?"" ""Round?"" ""Get a round"" ""I get a round?"" ""Get a round...."""

"Who is the original Kardashian? Saint Christopher"

"You know what doesn't cry? Birth control"

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea I won't pay 200 to have a lentil on my face"

"If you open Pandora's Box you better at least buy her dinner."

"My neighbor's wife asked me if I wanted to help make her husband jealous... I said ""sure!"" and hung myself in the bedroom closet."

"So I bought a fragrant candle the other day, but when I lit it nothing happened... It just didn't make scents."

"Jay-Z has vowed to never use the word ""bitch"" again I guess he has 100 problems now."

"I liked the movie Taken better the first time I saw it when it was called Finding Nemo."

"[intercom] Please stop putting clown shoes on the sacrificial goat. The ritual is in 3 days & the other cults aren't taking us seriously."