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Joke of the Day

"Why do little dogs shake so much? They have Barkinson's"

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"I wonder how much more I would have time to accomplish in my life if hotel lamp switches were always in the same place."
"Who is a chemist's favorite Game of Thrones character? Stannous Baratheon."
"In honor of Father's day, here is a typical dad joke. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint."
"Like my Uncle used to say, the best part of Twenty one year olds... ...is there's twenty of them."
"Now I know why Charlie Sheen was always Winning... ...he was just being positive."
"Your mom's so slutty, she got fired for drinking on the job. She worked at a sperm bank."
"I like my coffee like I like my women... ...in two enormous cups."
"I'm not an expert on masturbating But I hold my own"
"Why /r/Hillaryclinton is a ghost town All their keyboards have water damage."