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Joke of the Day
"How did the turtle call his friends? ...on his shellphone"
Next Joke
"My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD Bin at Walmart...."
"My girlfriend and I couldn't agree on which guitar strings to play In the end we struck an A Chord"
"Why is Forrest Gump as a young boy without his leg braces like a Samurai without a master? Because everywhere he went, he was Ronin! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'll see myself out..."
"What is a simile? It's like a metaphor."
"Saying ""guns don't kill people, bullets do"" is like saying ""I haven't raped anyone, but my dick has."""
"Animal sounds Cats go meow Rats go squeak Dogs go woof Pigs go ""Put your hands on your fucking head unless you wanna be shot in your fucking skull!"""
"Have you heard about the Polish strip club? There are Poles everywhere."
"To what branch of the military to babies belong? The infantry."
"My buddy plays golf like a man masturbating in a cold shower No matter how he strokes it's just not going to happen"