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Joke of the Day

"Did you know they now sell 30 tog blankets? Duvet?"

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"[Spelling Bee] Your word is palindrome ""Can you use it in a sentence?"" Go hang a salami I'm a lasagna hog."
"I wish that Game of Thrones was on Twitter So George RR had to limit it to less than 140 characters."
"What do you call a whale with erectile dysfunction? Mopey Dick."
"When I have to make a difficult decision in life I think what would grandma do, then I leave home in my nightie & shout at random strangers."
"50% of Indian Roads are filled up with holes. And the rest are filled up with Assholes !!"
"I like my girlfriends how I like my wine... 10 years old and locked in a cellar"
"Always heard this on the playground growing up... Pete and Repeat were in a boat, but Pete fell out. Who was left?..."
"[dinner party] *removing myself from table* Excuse me, I have to take this. *picks up host's dog* *leaves*"
"""It's a bird!"" ""It's a plane!""... What the hell were those two so excited about?"