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Joke of the Day

"One of my students told me he was drinking formic acid to settle his indigestion. After all, I suppose it is an *ant* acid."

"What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo? One's a quite heavy, and the other's a little lighter."

"Jesus' Greatest Miracles: 3) Turning water to wine 2) Raising Lazarus 1) Maintaining a milky-white complexion in a desert climate for 33 yrs"

"If I was an enzyme, I would be DNA Helicase So I could unzip your genes."

"What does electron and proton say when they go to war? Chaaaarge!!"

"What do you call a Muslim optometrist who has no regards for his patients? Asif Eyecare"

"what gets wet when it dries?? a towel"

"I'll never forget the first time we met Although, I'll keep trying ."

"My doctor told me I only have two months left to live so I shot him, judge gave me 30 years."

"I say waiter there's a fly in my soup! Well throw him a doughnut - they make fantastic life belts!"