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Joke of the Day

"My Load Is So Big Jokes http://myloadissobig.blogspot.com/"

"Why is the moon so grumpy? It's just going through one of its phases."

"No one is more confident than a drunk girl wearing a guy's hat sideways."

"When do chickens stop laying eggs? Henopause"

"My friends and I are all dressing as different Robin Williams characters at a Comic Con this weekend... We're the Suicide Squad!"

"I have my entire Valentine's day planned with my toaster! Okay, so first, we're going to take a bath."

"Leaving early on a Friday and saying, ""Have a good weekend!"" to people who have to work a full day is like dancing in front of a paraplegic."

"Me: You're supposed to be taking a nap 4-year-old: I am Me: Then why are you standing here? 4-year-old: Me: 4-year-old: This is a dream"

"Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, he gets drunk."

"[wearing a 'World's Greatest Dad' t-shirt while talking to the bartender] ""The younger one is about 8 and the older one is older than 8."""