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Joke of the Day

"My friends and I are all dressing as different Robin Williams characters at a Comic Con this weekend... We're the Suicide Squad!"

"I said to my dyslexic mate, ""Guess which band has split up?"" He said, ""Erm..."""

"There's no 'i' in team... No, but there's a 'u' in cunt!"

"They're predicting record highs for Wednesday. In other news the weather will be hotter than usual."

"Can't get a girl? Rip out your rib and make your own! Critics are raving ""this doesn't work"" and ""I'm bleeding to death""."

"What's the difference between a line of naked women and a magician? Well, the magician has a cunning array of stunts..."

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? Rotten eggs"

"An Italian and a black jump out of a tree. Who lands first? The Italian. The black is tied to the tree."

"Take a deep breath. Good. Now count to 10. Right. Now slap someone in their face. Nice. Feel better?"

"Why does T-Pain always look well rested? Because he is a NAPPY BOY!!!"