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Joke of the Day

"5 bucks will get you 1 minue access to the ""Peck cam"" where you can watch all sorts of wild birds peck me while i force myself not to resist"

"My dad used to say me ""what ever you do, don't get killed like a pussy"" and this comes from a man that died in his shed."

"I got really drunk last night, so I decided to take the bus home... I've never driven a bus before!"

"What did the mama pig say to her bad little piglet? ""Behave or Frankenswine will get you."""

"Q: How many letters 'T' are in Indiana Jones? A: 17. Ta-ta-tat'-taaa ta-ta-taa Ta-ta-tat'-taaa ta-taa-taa-taaa!"

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Doesn't matter how many of them come, they can't change a thing."

"Mr. Trump, who's your Secretary of State? TRUMP: To deal with China, one that speaks Mandarin [remembers to appeal to women] or Womandarin"

"Why couldn't the bicycle stand up for itself? Because it was two-tyred."

"Why did the baker have smelly hands? Because he needed a poo."

"My fiancee doesn't think jokes about drone strikes are funny. Personally I find them Hillaryous."