217883
Joke of the Day
"Nobody is as conflicted as a Jewish zombie about to eat Kevin Bacon."
Next Joke
"A haunted house where they make you look at your checking account balance."
"There are 10 types of people in the world... Those who understand binary and those who don't."
"Where do banana slaves go to work? Plantaintions."
"What kind of tie is best to wear in a fight? Muay Thai"
"Sorry I haven't been able to get back to you, I've been pretty busy chasing this cherry tomato around my plate with a fork. Almost. Got. It."
"3 guys just arrived to heaven and... 3 guys just arrived to heaven and then Jesus proceeds to call by their names: - ""Rand"" kiss my hand! - ""Pete"" kiss my feet! Then Jesus: Rick!? Why are you running?"
"[talking to life insurance agent] Let me get this right. I pay you until I die, then someone ELSE gets the money? No thanks."
"I received a text message from an unknown number ""I'm sorry. It's not your fault. I met someone else. Please don't call me anymore!"" ... Even other people's girlfriends are dumping me now"
"Cashier: how old r u? Me:*holding beer nervously* uuh 21 Cashier:*shaking his head sadly as he pulls Trix out of my cart* Trix are for kids."