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Joke of the Day

"My angry wife said: ""I hope you spend an eternity in hell !"".... I said, ""Why wait? I'll take you clothes shopping right now""."

"Did you hear about the new corduroy pillowcases? They're making head lines!"

"What do you call a fancy toilet? A dapper crapper"

"To ensure that my wife will truly miss me when I go on trips, right before I leave I put a few spiders in the bedroom."

"If Kanye West was an egg... ...he'd be over-Yeezy."

"Did you know the inventor of the vibrator heard voices saying... ""If you build it, they will come."""

"You hear about the moneyless porn star that started selling double-ended dildos? She was just trying to make ends meet."

"There are 3 types of people in the world. Those who know math and those who don't."

"Dear Fork, I know we haven't spoken since I ran away with Dish, but I thought you should know you have a son. His name is Spork. He has your hair. Sincerely, Spoon"

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? It's white and on their land."