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Joke of the Day

"Doesn't get paid: has popcorn and vodka martinis for dinner. Gets paid: has popcorn and raspberry vodka martinis for dinner."

"What did the Muslim on a surfboard say? Aloha Akbar!"

"What is a Redditor's favorite car brand? The Snoobaru."

"What's the difference between a Canadian woman and a moose? 50 pounds and a flannel."

"Did you hear about the psychic midget who escaped police custody? Be on the lookout for a small medium at large."

"Why is a bear brown? Because he crawls in his hole during winter."

"So I asked my Dad, ""What was on Grandpa's mind when he had that aneurysm?"" ""Probably a tumor."""

"A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much it is for a beer. The bartender says ; ""For you.. No charge!"""

"""Hey, boo"" - a casual ghost"

"The sum of the cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrot divided by the mayo. That's Cole's Law."