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Joke of the Day

"I went for a job as a stunt double, I stubbed my toe on my way out the door. As soon as I stopped crying, I went to the interview. Bravery."

"For Christmas my wife wanted something that went from 0 to 100 in 4 seconds. So I bought her a scale."

"What did the spice merchant say when someone knocked on his door? Cumin!"

"A Short Joke Dwarves and midgets have very little in common."

"Who can make more money in a week, a drug dealer or a prostitute? The prostitute because she can wash and resell her crack."

"*puts on shirt* *notices shirt has OBVIOUS stain* *takes off shirt* *hangs back up for future attempt at wearing shirt*"

"Tips for Guys on Valentine's Day: Tell your girl you already got something and make her guess. She'll automatically list things she want."

"Women call it a secret sixth sense, men call it paranoia."

"What did the milk say after it got beat? ...It's butter this way"

"Straight Outta Compton left out Dr. Dreas history of abuse against women Because they didn't want to turn this drama film into a comedy!"