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Joke of the Day

"The cleaning people unplugged my radio and lost my settings, so I'm shooting fingernail clippings all over my office floor to punish them."

"What is Shakespeare's favourite snack? Hamlet du fromage"

"when chuck Norris went to find Bigfoot, Bigfoot copied him self to escape from chuck"

"For those who believe that size doesn't matter....would you be satisfied if your woman brought you a small sandwich?"

"Why is Mickeys dog named Pluto? Because hes not a planet."

"My most forced joke. How did the lumberjack keep his business from falling behind when all the trees ran out? By moving faux wood. Rimshot?"

"Last night I found out that my wife has conditional gender dysphoria. She said that she needed to be Frank with me."

"I remember when I was young and dad used to play ""Got Your Nose"". It was far less traumatic than Uncle Carl's game of ""Got Your Weiner""."

"Why did America remove the ""u"" from color? Because fuck u that's why"

"Me: Excuse me, where are your nails that twist? Worker: You mean screws? Me: I don't know, I'm not a nail scientist. Worker...."