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Joke of the Day

"Half Indian I have a friend who's half Indian. Ian."

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"Q: How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb? A: We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed."
"I'm looking for a girlfriend that likes me for my money, but is really bad at math..."
"If you ever have to say ""just kidding,"" you're probably not very good at kidding and you should stop kidding"
"Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife."
"Whoa. Wait a minute. So those stick figures on your car aren't for pedestrians you ran over? Damn it! *starts scraping off her stickers*"
"I hate people who talk behind my back. They discussed me"
"HELLO FELLOW HUMAN TEENS I HEARD THE COOLEST PLACE FOR US TEENS TO HANG OUT IS The Colossal Pillar of Wasp Eggs LETS GO DO NOT BRING WEAPONS"
"This Halloween, I put a potato in my pants and ordered people around. I was a dictator."
"I saw this one guy really, really beat Bobby Flay It was his ex wife's lawyer."