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Joke of the Day

"A granny comes to see a doctor - and the doctor is a granny too."

"I wanted to get a haircut today after work around 8:45... but they closed at 9, so that's cutting it close."

"What's Jesus' Favourite gun? A nailgun"

"What do you call a gay drive-by? A fruit roll up."

"Five chickens leave Topeka traveling west at 25 mph. Please help me find them chickens. Those are my chickens."

"I joked about a robot uprising until I waved at an automatic paper towel dispenser and nothing happened. THEY'RE EVOLVING INTO PRETTY GIRLS!"

"Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic! *ba dim tiss*"

"Joke from my daughter Her: Why did the chicken cross the road? Me: Why? Her: To get to the ugly guy's house. Me:??? Her: Knock knock Me: Who's there? Her: It's the chicken!"

"I was dating an analog synthesizer But I had to break it off. She was just continuously variable."

"What is the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, ""Spit out your gum,"" but a train says, ""Chew chew!"""