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Joke of the Day

"New study says glasses help with math. Apparently they are good for davision"

"If you hate awkward silences, then necrophilia isn't for you."

"The worst part about blind dates is trying to find a restaurant with menus in braille."

"Why was the little boy crying at the diamond store? He went to Jared"

"I used to assume most people were bright, kind, and at least somewhat informed. Then social media was invented."

"At a job interview: Interviewer: What are some of your weaknesses? Applicant: I'm lazy I: that's it? A: I'm lazy to list them all..."

"As a female carpenter, I'm often asked if I prefer... To get screwed or nailed..."

"Why did the guy get aroused by the highway? Because there were lots of turn ons."

"I would show you a Liszt of all the music jokes I know... But to be Franck, I don't think you could Handel them!"

"What's worse than having a girlfriend with no tits? Having tits and no girlfriend."