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Joke of the Day

"I saw my ex while taking a test today wonder if she cheated on that too..."

"How many New Yorkers does it take to change a light bulb? Mind yer own fuckin' business!"

"So far my favorite part about being pregnant is telling people I'm not pregnant when they ask when I'm due."

"INTERVIEWER: Why do you want to work here? ME: *crumbs tumbling from my mouth* Oh, I don't. I was just walking by and saw you had donuts."

"I tried to get back to the drawing board but I can't draw."

"According to NASA Size DOES matter."

"Please stop telling me how poor you are via Twitter for iPhone"

"Do you know why there's no sound when Django has sex? Because the D is silent."

"I figured out why we abbreviate BlowJob with BJ 'cuz it's a mouthful"

"Why is the Canadian Mint so confusing? Because they don't make any cents."