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Joke of the Day

"What do you call the bad part of Italy? Spaghetto."

"I bought perforated paper once It was a total rip off"

"Guys insult each other and don't really mean it. Girls compliment each other and don't really mean it either"

"What do you call a body in a morgue which hasn't been viewed by anyone yet? Remains to be seen."

"God and Lazarus God said to Lazarus, ""Come forth, and receive eternal life!"" However, Lazarus came fifth and received a toaster."

"I played dead in the living room to see how my 2yo would respond. He climbed on my ""corpse"" for 5 minutes then turned on the tv."

"Croquet is a great game If you have the balls for it."

"Guys, you CAN catch AIDS from a toilet seat! If you sit down before the other guy gets up."

"Americans are getting stronger Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it."

"Some girl is stalking me & has been telling ppl I'm her boyfriend. I'm flattered but I prefer to be the psychotic one in the relationship"