21565

Joke of the Day

"I bet the guy who invented the percent symbol, %, got his inspiration from watching his wife put on a seatbelt"

"What do you call a Native American girl that is really good with directions? A Navajo."

"I was at Redbox, but I didn't know what to watch. I consulted my groceries, and my pizza said, ""Keep Frozen."""

"What do you give to an elephant with diarrhea? Plenty of room."

"Apparently people are using smart phones instead of credit cards now. I tried this but my cocaine was very lumpy."

"Everything is made in China, except for babies, they're made in VaChina!"

"Who are the real Guardians of the Galaxy? Security at Samsung."

"6.9 what is 6.9? a really great thing ruined by a period"

"*shakes self after staring at ceiling* Sorry honey, I was just thinking about Mitt Romney"

"What is the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other is a pause at the end of a clause."