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Joke of the Day

"Why shouldn't we talk about Catholic Priests? It's a touchy subject."

"the most efective way to clean ur room, start a creative project, run errands, cook, brush ur teeth and take a shower is to study for a exam"

"Why cant the Rolling stones ever be pastors? We all know they dont gather mass."

"*points to refrigerator* That makes things cold *points to stove* That makes things hot *points to self* That makes things awkward"

"I'm not a ""stalker"". I want to make sure you're okay at all times. You can look at me as an unpaid bodyguard."

"After my date orders, I always tell the waiter ""Nothing for me..I'll be eating later"" Then wink at my date & raise my eyebrows suggestively!"

"The US goverment EDIT: Sorry, I know this isn't fairly original. I promise better next time."

"Dream carefully, because dreams come true."

"Husband: I'll unload the dishwasher for you, honey. Me: No rush. 3 days later.......regrets saying no rush."

"#NotMyPresident Yes, we know. You are illegal immigrants, your president is Enrique Pena Nieto"