214888

Joke of the Day

"My old guitar teacher was arrested yesterday... He got caught fingering A Minor."

"Candy cigarettes are a gateway drug to rock candy."

"Be There or Be Square Because if you will be there, you will be around."

"What do you call phrases that Jews often say? Judaisms."

"Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, ""We are family, even though you're fatter than me."""

"You know what a fat woman and a brick have in common? Both are laid by Mexicans."

"Come to my 127.0.0.1 and I'll give you sudo access."

"People who grew up in the 50's will get this. I was 15 before I realized that there was no reason why women's slacks had the zipper on the side."

"If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"

"Skydiving without a parachute... Is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I heard this on a spotify ad and it cracked me up. I thought I'd share it.:) Edit: fixed an auto correct mistake"