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Joke of the Day

"What does a dyslexic, agnostic insomniac do at night? Lie in bed wondering ""Is there really a dog?"""

"Why do Tajikistani people wear trucker hats? Cuz they're from Douche-anbe!"

"What did the mountain climber name his horse? Everest. Any time he is bored I see him Mount Everest."

"Apparently O.J. Simpson is getting remarried He decided to take another stab at it"

"What do you call an erection during a funeral? Mourning wood!"

"Where do Crows hang out on a friday nght? At a crow bar."

"What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry."

"I have a talent for only attracting people I have no interest in dating."

"Sooo much pressure as a woman to not have a mustache."

"Everyone was texting her good morning sunshine, so I texted her ""good morning solar eclipse"" Yeah, don't do that."